Biblical Love

Plymouth Congregational Church
I have solved a problem in my understanding of what Jesus and His disciples meant by "biblical love."

For years I have taught about the three basic Greek words we translate "love" in English. Here is what I said:

"Eros" love = (We get our term "erotic" from it) "MY feelings about another person when I sense they are feeling good about me."
This kind of "love" focuses on self.
It emphasizes how "I" feel.
It doesn't take into consideration the feelings or desires of the other person.
It should be translated "lust" instead of "love".
It is the "love" of so many movies and love stories.
It is never used in the Greek New Testament.

"Philos" love = I believe the best translation of this love is "friendship".
This kind of "love" is a two-way street.
It emphasizes the shared feelings and obligations we have with another person.
It helps us understand what real relationships should have.
Jesus used this word, especially on His last few days before and after the crucifixion and resurrection.

"Agap'e" love = The definition I was taught is "doing the best for someone else, even if there is no response."
I understood that feelings were not involved in it.
I knew that Jesus took a Greek word, already in existence - though seldom used, and gave a new definition to it.
I still believe the above, but, as I studied how the Greeks used this word I received a new insight into what Jesus and His disciples meant by this wonderful word.
The Greeks used this word to describe "family love"!
Now I understood why they didn't use this word very often!
Their "family love" was very low on their list of obligations.
The men had their "paramours".
They had slaves to take care of their children.
One of the major aspects of their "worship" involved sexual activities.
Wives were lower on the list of relationships than "lovers".
Suddenly, I began to understand why Jesus would take this word, and make it THE MAJOR EVIDENCE OF OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD!
Our relationship with God is that of "Father/child".
By receiving Jesus into our lives we are "born again"!
A major concept of our relationship with other believers is revealed in calling us "brothers" (or "brothers and sisters").
Our treatment of even our enemies is to remind ourselves that they are also made in the image of God, and are special to Him, even if they are not true believers.

No wonder Jesus said: "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love (agap'e) one another" (emphasis mine) [John 13:35 NIV].

My friends, I encourage you to back away from those who would only react in anger with those who disagree. Instead, it is necessary for us to "love" (agap'e) one another.

The major question I need to keep before me is "am I treating the other person as family"?